Left Wanting

I've been dreading today for a long time. Today's the day it's all supposed to happen. Today's the day the Girl is supposed to tell me he's coming, only to have me gather up all our stuff and race us down to Annapolis to see the doctor. Today's the day I'm supposed to be proud and happy and scared and curious. It's supposed to be today. It wasn't supposed to be New Years Eve.

I want to hear him cry for the first time. I want to feel him squeeze my finger. I want to hear him laugh. I want to give him the opportunity to do everything he would ever have wanted to do. I want to watch him take his first steps. I want to hear him speak his first word. I want to walk him to the bus stop in the morning for school.

I want to give him the world.

We miss your Andrew. Rest in peace Baby Bear.